Wednesday, February 27, 2013
Sticks and stones
I don't think well of some people. In fact, there are some people who rub me the wrong way so badly that my skin crawls when I think of them. I keep those thoughts to myself for a few reasons. First, what I think of them is none of their business...or anyone else's. Second, when I share my negative opinion with someone else, I spread that feeling leaving a veil of negative energy that affects our interactions. Third, whatever I think of a person doesn't make them that. Yet it does make me a person who judges. Thinking that someone is stupid does not make them stupid, but it does make me a person who has decided to be bothered by them, form an unproductive opinion and occupy mental real estate on something I have no control over: someone else's behavior or way of thinking.
When I focus on what bothers me in someone else, I get this sinus-imitating pressure behind my brow. I realize that whatever thought I am having that moment is what I am living, yet the person I am having unkind thoughts about is not affected by my thought.
The remedy to this is to become a noticer. Notice others, but don't form a personal opinion about them. Notice what bothers you about them. Is it that it reminds you of a trait in yourself that you don't like? Could you learn from this aspect of that person? We attract people into our lives for a reason. Notice, learn, find your lesson and grow.
Today, be the noticer, not the one who judges. Be lighthearted and kind with your thoughts.