Friday, December 21, 2018

The Naughty List

Who keeps Santa's list? You know, The Naughty or Nice List. This is one job I wouldn't want to have–to keep track of who does good and who does bad. How would I really know? How could I judge another without an absolute understanding of their background, upbringing, beliefs, thought processes, state of emotions, sense of self, and level of awareness? Yet, we do this everyday. Some of us more than others. Some of us, more purposefully than others. Yet, when we do, it's not for the mythical list, it's for reasons that do not serve us or a higher purpose.

Keeping track of the morality or righteousness of others' actions taints our own morality. While we judge others, we are diverting our attention from our own actions which is where our focus really makes a difference. Moreover, keeping track of the rights or wrongs that others make drains us of precious energy, and makes us gossipy, pessimistic, unpleasant and negative. It is not our job to condemn or absolve others. We do better by allowing others to be, to learn, to do, to atone, to grow, to walk their path. Our judgment stands in the way of their growth and ours.

Today is a good day to hold a space where people can abide without judgment. Let us offer acceptance, empathy, compassion, patience, kindness, and generosity of spirit. Let us relax our critical minds and open our hearts and minds to lightness of being, inner peace, equanimity, friendliness, hospitality, benevolence, warmth and, in so, enjoy a general sense of ease, tranquility and peace. Let us relax our judgment that we may smile, enjoy the moment, take pleasure in the holiday spirit, make cheerful memories, and have a good time.

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© Millicent Maldonado and www.soulcerer.com. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. All rights reserved.

Friday, December 14, 2018

What would my mother do?

She taught my to be kind in all circumstances, to be generous with what I have and who I am. There are no reasons to be unkind was always the message, said or unsaid. She has lived and continues to live this way. Even in her strict and stern ways, my mother is always kind and always generous.

When someone rubs me the wrong way, is a jerk, is nasty, speaks ill of me or anyone else or acts wrong, my first instinct is to respond in-kind, to give them back what they dish out. But then a voice somewhere in the ether says What would mom do (WWMD)? When I mindfully consider the question, I respond in a way that not only would make my mother proud, it makes me proud. I am reminded that I am capable of making wiser choices, that I can be kind, that I can be generous. WWMD has become a guiding principle.

The other day we ordered groceries. The tab came in a little higher than I had budgeted for, so when I went to my wallet to get cash for a tip for the delivery person, I pulled a $1 bill. A $1 bill! Geez, it's Christmastime and I pull a $1 bill! My mom would have given him a more generous tip and not hesitated. That's what she would have done. The voice of WWMD came over me, thankfully, before I handed him the tip. I did the kind thing.

The highest version of myself has been built of many things my mother taught me. This highest version of myself now has a voice of its own. It helps me choose what to think, what to say, what to do, what tone of voice to use, how to walk into a room, and what attitude to carry. Today is a good day to ask WWMHSD? What would my higher self do? We know. We know what the highest version of ourself would do in any circumstance. We just have to ask and listen. Let's tap into that knowledge and be kind, be generous. Let's feel good that we can choose words, thoughts and actions that bring about thoughtfulness, sweetness, humanity, altruism, graciousness, loving-kindness, and goodwill. Let's ask WWMHSD? Then let us listen and respond in harmony with the highest version of ourselves.

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© Millicent Maldonado and www.soulcerer.com. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. All rights reserved.

Friday, December 7, 2018

Alarmed

It was 5:20 in the morning. I was sitting by my window, writing. The soft light of my table lamp cast a warm glow over my hands as I wrote. That's what I was appreciating in the foreground of my attention while, in the background, I was grateful for the peace and tranquility of the moment. In an instant, the harmony was interrupted by a car alarm. The sound rose up from the parking lot up to my window. I took a deep breath and ignored it. It went on for 15 minutes or so until it finally quit.

The alarm was supposed to alert someone to do something about the car. No one did. It, apparently, was not a real emergency. It was a malfunction. And though I was able to ignore it, I still felt the tension. In a similar way, we hear all sorts of alarms during the day. Some are burglary alarms from cars and buildings, some are clock alarms, and some are emergency vehicle alarms. There are other types of alarms we bear. Drama, conflict, histrionics keep us on alert in much of the same way. They create the same type of fear and reactions in our body as a fire or burglary alarm, yet, we're not in real danger. Some of the stories we tell ourselves create alarms too, warning us of dangers that we guard ourselves from. Then there are the rumors, scandals, gossip, malicious talk, speculation, and news that we participate in, creating animosity and fear, warning us of dangers that are not necessarily imminent or real. Add to all of these the many notifications we subscribe to on our social media apps. We stay alarmed, even if we are not reacting to do something about it. This state of alarm keeps us vulnerable, worried, stressed and anxious, harming our relationships and our health.

Today is a good day to mute our alarms. Let's be mindful of what we engage in. When we start entertaining thoughts that do not serve us, that fuel the fire of our fears, let's take a deep and slow breath, then another, then another. When panic sets in, let's acknowledge and name our fear. Recognizing what alarms us many times can help us diffuse state of emergency we create for ourselves. Let's turn our attention away from the alarms to what we can be grateful for, what adds joy to our life, what enriches our experience, what blesses others, and what brings us peace.
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© Millicent Maldonado and www.soulcerer.com. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. All rights reserved.