Friday, August 9, 2013

Giving and receiving...same difference

Most of us where raised with the belief that it is better to give than to receive. This is a noble thought. Yet, many carry it into martyrdom and spoon it into their children with a side of guilt and obligation, not realizing that one is not different from another. When giving is seen as a chore, an imposition or a debt, the nature of giving is spoiled.

Giving is noble and the act of giving should be done with noble intentions. The giving of things, time, advice, money and companionship all begin with a thought and a desire–conscious or not. Whatever we give is given together, as a bundle, with that feeling. In turn, it returns to us.

Consider people you may know who are always doing for someone else. They tirelessly work, but somehow are always stuck in their condition of life. You wonder how they can go on like that–the sacrificed mother with no time or energy for herself, the always-broke friend who keeps bailing others out of their financial troubles, the teacher who is always stuck at school after hours with no help from his colleagues. Do you wonder where the reciprocity of life is? It is right there. From the outside, we see how much they do, how much they offer. But what we don't see is the rumbling within, their expectation for something in return, their need for acknowledgement, their lack of self-worth–all stemming from insecurity and fear. They are receiving what they are giving out.

Giving and receiving are two parts of a whole. When we give from a place of security and love, we are placing into the larger well of abundance that which we wish to share–material things, joy, laughter, opportunities for growth, understanding, friendship, love, affection, attention, time. It is the same well we tap into for ourselves.

Today is a good day to give with a smile from within, without any anticipation. We give because it is who we are. Whatever we give of ourselves, know that we are not losing, but gaining. This is one of the ways we love. Let's also let others give to us and to others and let us receive gracefully that we may not stop the flow of goodness. If you feel that you don't have much to give, then just give thanks. Today is a good day to give...and receive. It is all the same.

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