Thursday, July 11, 2013

To love and let go

Either it ends or changes. It is anything or any situation. Nothing lasts forever. No-thing lasts forever. This is especially hurtful when it comes to romantic relationships. We enjoy someone, love them and wish to be with them forever. We dream up a life together. Then it ends or changes. What changes? Why don't relationships last in the state in which we are happiest?

Loving relationships fill a void within us. This feeling of completion boosts our mood, self-esteem and even our energy level. It has drug-like effects. When we are in love, we are high on love. This works for a while, but, before long, whatever issues this "love" is masking will surface. Insecurity, fear, emotional pain, low self-worth and feelings of lack come up. Where this "love" seemed to be a balsam on our wounds, you now perceive your partner to be the cause of these painful feelings. In turn, your partner may feel the same way. There's no high anymore, just an addiction.

I know a couple who has enjoyed a loving relationship for a while. The Universe brought them together. Yet it seems that the time has come to inventory their experiences together, the lessons learned, the growth, the memories and to go their separate ways. They have been there for each other during difficult times and during the lull between excitement. They came together out of a long-standing friendship to carry each other through a transitional time in their lives. At this crossroad, neither partner agrees on the road to take. Their feelings toward each other remain unchanged, but what they want from each other, what each of their egos insist on, their expectations for each other, pull in different directions.

There's no judgment in this. There's only love, real love...the kind that loves with no conditions, that wants the best for each person, that accepts each person completely as they are. This is tough for us mortals, I know. But to love sometimes means to let go, to end the codependency, to release each other so that each person can work on their issues and reveal their essential state which is one of wholeness.

This is an important time in their relationship. It is time to open and accept each other as each one is, to be whole on their own, for they are whole. It is time to release each other to follow their own paths and fulfill their purpose rather than stay in this attached, dependent, unfulfilling state. It is time to love each other and let go. No thing lasts forever. True love does. Letting go of someone you love is love. It is love for them, love for yourself and for the Universe. Letting go is one tough expression of love, but one in which both partners can reveal their completeness and, in so, share true love.


  1. That's maybe truth... but it's so painful. I can't believe that two people, who really love each other, couldn't agree in things that actually don't necessarily set them apart. Truly love is powerful.

  2. To believe someone needs to love you to be happy is a manifestation of our ego. We most love ourselves and not expect love from someone else. If somebody wants to give us the gift of love we should feel great full but not expect it to last forever since that someone is also loving himself to its fullest and the universe may pull him to where he truly wants to be, it may be a career far away, or its life purpose.